This week marks the end of the first week of Ramadan, the Islamic month of fasting where Muslims all over the world participate in what is a 'dry fast' from sunrise to sunset - yes this means 'not even water'! I had a very different attitude to it this time. I decided to be much clearer about my routine and plan everything in my diary - I even have reminders to tell me what is going in my various drinks from sunset to sunrise - from apple cider vinegar, to potassium, to collagen powder! 

Sounds like hard work, right? 

Well... yesterday I ended up having an impromptu day off from my strict routine... I needed some breathing space.... but this could have also been a complete derailer.

I am back into it today. What happened? 

Many years ago when we were living in Malaysia we were lucky enough to attend the F1 (Formula 1) race there with paddock attendance. Paddock access is rare and exclusive! What this means is that we could see the various F1 teams practice pit stops and other pre race activities. 

The pit stop practices... just wow!!! Watching the various teams take seconds to change car tyres is amazing — I went from F1 team to F1 team in awe of how much trust and cohesion exists in each crew... which can include up to 22 people. I wanted to know who held the current record for pitstops — I had to look it up — was shocked to see that McLaren currently holds the world record for pit stops  at 1.8 seconds. That is 22 people coming together with precision to change 4 tyres in a car. You can see the video here and if you blink you will literally miss it. 

Pit stops are important in life too. It is all part of having the right pieces and support to be able to continue in the journey. 

Weekends can be a pitstop, as can holidays, slow coffee breaks (one my favourites as you know, partly because it is so accessible!), and perhaps a month to reset your schedule can also be a longer pitstop? 

My approach to Ramadan has been different this year because I am using it as an opportunity to reset some routines I previously had, and to also test some things out. Things I have learned so far:

— a day off is needed, that doesn't mean a day off from everything, but rest is important and that includes

— physical rest (no exercise),

— emotional rest (for me that is spending time alone),

— spiritual rest (sitting in meditation, prayer, or allowing your breath to breath you...),

— intellectual rest (not worrying about the to do list),

— and reconnection with who I am... 

All of these things require pit stops in the day, week, and month in order to happen - after all we can all have lists of things we hope to achieve and are doing very little of them and then feel as if parts of our life are not in integrity with who we want to be...

Pit stops in life are essential, so taking a day off is important... and perhaps rather than precisely planning in when I will take a day off (pit stop) I allow it to emerge naturally. Just so you know, when I plan in days off from my routine I find that it can derail me, but when I know that I must take a day off and allow it to happen then I feel reenergised and refueled. 

So, as I reflect on this my biggest learning in the first week of Ramadan has been to know that pit stops are needed but not to plan them ahead. I suspect that the F1 teams have an idea of when a pit stop is required but if they were to say it will happen at precisely lap 18 then it would create tension between the driver and their team. What I have reaslised is that when I am precise with my pit stop there is internal tension and it can create frustration with myself, derail me off my program, or leave me just feeling a bit irritated.... and as you know none of these things are good! 

The analogy of knowing that a pit stop is needed can be applied to study for exams, working on a major project, or being in a work or life transition. A pit stop is needed but if you say it can only happen in a short window of time then subconsciously are restricting the impact of it and then it can act as a derailer. In order for the break, or pitstop, to have full impact you need to do it when you need it, not when your calendar says! 

And that reminds me of the 'to be' list as opposed to the 'to do' list. Do you have one of these? 

I suspect we all have to do lists (in one way, shape, or form!). Take the same principles of how you create your to do list and apply it to a 'to be' list. I did that exercise before Ramadan started and my 'to be' list included: 

— be honest with yourself

— be kind to yourself

— don't be too harsh on yourself

— be nourished: sleep well, drink enough water, take your vitamins, adjust the diary as necessary

— be grounded

What would be on your 'to be' list? 

A quick poem that I'll share with you before I leave... I shared it with someone about 10 days ago and since then I have seen it in several places... 

Maybe the entire message above is one idea to help you to feast on your life...

Love After Love, by Derick Walcott

The time will come
when, with elation
you will greet yourself arriving
at your own door, in your own mirror
and each will smile at the other's welcome,

and say, sit here. Eat.
You will love again the stranger who was your self.
Give wine. Give bread. Give back your heart
to itself, to the stranger who has loved you

all your life, whom you ignored
for another, who knows you by heart.
Take down the love letters from the bookshelf,

the photographs, the desperate notes,
peel your own image from the mirror.
Sit. Feast on your life.

What would you do if you allowed yourself to feast on your life? 

Who would you meet if you saw yourself in the mirror? 

I'll leave you to ponder on these as you go into the next part of your week. 

All my best,

Saiyyidah

The Space